Merry {first} Christmas!

While Trey was in Kenya, I found out some things about Little Man that I wasn't sure of. Based on his name, people had told us that he was from an Islamic family. I confirmed this by asking some of the older kids where he is currently living. They said they knew for sure because the first couple of days he was there he performed his prayers 5 times a day. Then when he realized no one else was doing it, he stopped. I had them ask him {he's still learning French and doesn't always understand mine :)} if he still knew the prayers. He said yes. My eyes began to open and my mind began to race and my heart began to melt. What did we ever do to deserve to be this kid's parents? What a privilege.

Trey returned the Monday before Christmas. Little Man asked me if he could be at the airport when "papa" came back. I told him unfortunately that wouldn't work out, but we would be back to see him soon. It worked out that Little Man {and a friend} were able to stay the night with us Tuesday night. This was HUGE. First, he got to see what our life was like. He got to see how we would love him in our home, provide for him, and essentially how things work in our home. Trey took him to see the beach for the first time. He tried {but didn't like} pizza. He played with blocks for the first time. He broke one of Chandler's toys, the first of many I'm sure. He opened his first Christmas gifts. And Chandler stole them, again not the only time this will happen. It was a great night. The next day I made lunch and he wasn't ready to eat. I asked him to eat since we needed to get on the road to head back to Sakété. He took a few bites, pushed the food away and walked out the front door. I thought he was going to play with Barley {the dog} as he had done before. Then I heard the gate to the road open and shut. I took off, yelling at Trey, afraid of what was going on. I go out to find him throwing up. We tried to ask him what was going on. He wouldn't talk. We asked if he wasn't feeling well. Silence. We assured him we weren't mad, just wanted to know why he threw up. Silence. We then got the friend {who's much older} to talk to him in the local language. Silence. So then we enlisted Rigo, the man who helps around our house and seems to have a way with kids. Rigo talked, Little Man answered. Apparently, he wasn't hungry, but thought I'd be mad if he didn't eat what I made him. So he tried, it hurt his stomach, so he threw it up. We told him it was ok. We weren't mad, just concerned. He then took a 2 hour nap - knocked out, snoring kind of nap - which he doesn't take naps anymore.

All in all, it was a good two days. But it only got better for this mama's heart. Remember when I said he came from an Islamic family, well that means that this Christmas was the first time he's ever celebrated Jesus' birth. I don't think that God made Trey sick so that we would be able to spend Christmas with Little Man, but I do think that God blessed us with the opportunity to spend his first Christmas with him in the midst of our trials. We sat there and watched as he heard the Christmas story for the first time. We watched as scripture was read and the birth of our Savior was made the most important. And then we watched as he excitedly opened his Christmas gifts. That night, we invited him to stay the night at our friend's apartment with us. He agreed to staying in the same room with us & Chandler. When bedtime came, tears started coming. We aren't sure exactly why… maybe he was just overwhelmed with everything, but eventually he made his way into our room and to the palette we made for him next to Chandler. I sat there and rubbed his back until he was asleep. Trey and I slept soundly having our 2 kids under one roof - our little family of four.

When we decided to adopt an older child, I accepted the fact that we wouldn't see a lot of his "firsts." You know, first smile, first laugh, first word, first steps, first solid foods, first holidays… all of those typical firsts. But God showed me differently. They may not be all the same "firsts" that Chandler had, but there are surprisingly a lot - first Christmas, first American food, first time at the beach, first time playing with blocks, and the list will go on and continue to grow.

We are still a little ways out from having Little Man permanently in our home, but every day is one step closer. And having days and nights like those mentioned above is an incredible insight into our future. We are so thankful that God has given us the opportunity to have another child and the opportunity to currently build a relationship with him. After we had Chandler, I wondered how it was possible to have more children and love them the same. I even asked other mothers how they did it. Their answer was that it just happens. Now, I understand. It just happens.

2013: a look back

Wow. 2013 has been one of the most incredible years ever. The theme of our marriage has not stopped. Still lots of traveling and moving this year, but we are at least settled for a while.

This year started with us in Nigeria. After an unsettling event, we began to question if we were in the right place for us. We returned to the states to have Chandler, not knowing what we should do. After much prayer, conversation, and reflection, we decided to look for other positions in our organization that were in a less tumultuous place. We settled on Benin and then focused on our baby coming!



Chandler was born March 13. The day that forever changed us. There are small details of the day I may forget, but for the most part I can remember everything. Trey tells me that I've already forgotten about the pain of the contractions. I mean, they weren't that bad, right?! I was determined to have her on the 13th, though, because I thought it would be a cool birthday - 3.13.13 - cool, right?!

Two and a half months later we boarded our plane to Benin. We landing in French speaking Africa and already felt a peace. It was very different than Nigeria. Still a very lost area, just a different kind. We immediately jumped into language study and worked on getting our house ready to move in. With in two weeks we were moved in and doing full time language study.


Shortly after our arrival, we headed to Kenya for a retreat. The time with other workers from our organization was amazing. And the weather was absolutely wonderful on top of the mountain! Seriously, it was freezing at night. Chandler slept in footie pajama's, two swaddling blankets, a fleece blanket, and a hat! After the retreat was over we had the opportunity to go on a Safari! Once in a lifetime opportunity. I encourage anyone who EVER has the opportunity to go on a safari - jump on it. Seriously, incredible. And we didn't even see all the animals.

We made it back to Benin and back into French study. We were able to help with a few volunteer teams here. That gave us great insight in to Benin and the people here. We also got to do the touristy things with them and had the chance to visit Ganvie for the first time. We got introduced to Frances early on in our arrival to Benin. We also met her family. Her uncle has become a good friend of ours and through him Trey had the opportunity to share the gospel with his friend and see a new believer. We also had a volunteer team come from Hiland Park Baptist to do a pastor's training. It was nice to have friends visit.

In August, I experienced my first time driving in Africa. Seriously, that's a feat worthy of mentioning in the yearly post. In October, we took a trip to Ghana for a short break. We really enjoyed our time with friends. In November, we celebrated Thanksgiving at the American Ambassador's house! It's as close to America as we could get. We watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, football, and ate turkey & ham and other American classics made by guests.

December started with us preparing to come to the states for Christmas. We headed to Florida and had a great time with family & friends. The whole time we were back and forth between Panama City & Pensacola. We celebrated the marriage of one of my best friends, Michelle (and Jeremy), at the end of December in Dothan. Then, Trey's birthday on December 29th. New Year's Even was simple since we had a sick kiddo, but she quickly got over that.

This year really has been incredible. We are so thankful for the opportunities the Lord has provided us with this year. We are so thankful for your support, prayers, and encouragement as we strive to do what we have been called to.

language learning

Can we talk for just a minute about language learning? And not just learning another language, but learning another language in a country where English is widely spoken. Learning a new language is never easy. In high school we were required to take a foreign language. I took French because there was 1 French teacher and she was easy and 3 Spanish teachers, only one of which was easy. Clearly, French was the best option. And I enjoyed it too. However, there are very few things I can remember in the French language. I know some basic Spanish (like 1-10 and how are you) because it's easy to pick up in America. And when I went to Ecuador and was submersed in the language, it seemed easy to pick up. English, French, and Spanish all have similarities. They've all be relatively easy to learn, even just the basics.

Here, we're learning Hausa. Hausa is not like English... in any way, shape, or form. I take that back, it uses the same alphabet, minus 3 or 4 letters. It sounds different. Hausa uses tones... of which I cannot hear. Take for instance the word gibi. Depending on the tone it can mean the Lord's Supper or it can mean the day after tomorrow. There's a big difference in those two things. In Hausa, you roll your r's and "swallow" some of the sounds. Not to mention, as with most languages, there are different dialects. There are places that use the p sound where an f is. There are places where people use a word to mean husband that in other parts mean a married women's boyfriend. We are doing barefoot language learning - meaning, we each have a helper that comes 4 times a week and we tell them what we need to know. And even though they speak good English, sometimes it takes some time to get across what we need to learn.

We had our first assessment about 6 weeks ago, and we both passed. But sometimes it's just really hard to progress to the next level. For me, I can understand a lot more than I can speak. I understand it because I know a few words in the sentence and use context clues (there's an elementary school teacher out there smiling because I still use context clues) to figure out what they're saying. Trey is great at speaking the language, but he doesn't always understand what is being asked of him. I would say we make a pretty good team. When we were traveling the other day we stopped at a checkpoint and Trey greeted the police in Hausa. They got excited, as they always do when we speak Hausa to them, and began to ask him more questions. I relayed what the officer asked to Trey and he then responded in almost perfect Hausa. Like I said, a good team.

Language learning isn't always easy, nor is it always fun. But what is fun is seeing the response we get from people. With English so widely spoken, they don't expect ex-pats to learn Hausa. When we can greet someone, answer simple questions, and tell them we're learning Hausa and we understand "kadun-kadun" (small-small) it changes the whole mood of everyone involved in the conversation. It shows people that you care enough to talk to them in their heart language. We've been at it for about 2 months and today was our last day with our helpers for at least a month. It will be difficult to come back and jump right in where we left off. We will forget things, and that's a little frustrating. So, pray that we will retain more than we think and we'll be able to continue to learn and pick it up quickly.